by Lucy Korn
Last night I saw Maleficent and despite the fact that I ended up sitting next to New Zealand’s creepiest biggest Angelina Jolie fan who’s first comment when she sat down was “I can’t WAIT to see my baby” then upon realizing it was in 3D something about being close enough to lick her face, it was thoroughly entertaining.
Maleficent (pronounced muh–lef–uh-suhnt for those of you who don’t know) Angelina Jolie’s first film in four years, tells the story of Sleeping Beauty through the eyes of the Villain herself. A villain who isn’t actually evil after all but just going through a bit of a rough patch, you know how it is.
I am no film critic so I don’t pretend to have any authority on the matter but I do have an opinion or opinions which I am going to force upon you here, in list format, because I can:
1. Disney would not have been able to make this film if it weren’t for Angelina. Not only because she is literally the perfect person for the role (compliment) but also because who would‘ve seen it if it was someone else?
2. Most the scenes sans Maleficent are kind of boring. Actually I should say most of the scenes sans Angelina Jolie are kind of boring because the young Maleficent is a bit annoying. Thankfully these are few and far between.
3. Sam Riley, who plays Maleficent’s crow/man servant, is awesome.
4.Whoever it is who plays the King’s wife is not a very good actress.
5. Watching this film makes you really, really mad that you can’t fly and/or live in a magical fairy world because it looks fugging fantastic.
6. Watching this film also makes you really wish you had yellow-y green eyes. Trust me.
7. Elle Fanning’s hair is magical.
8. Obviously the film is very well cast but I couldn’t get over the fact that Professor Umbridge from Harry Potter is one of the good fairies. That’s just not right Disney.
9. Maleficent can kick some serious butt. Then again, it wouldn’t be an Angelina Jolie film if it didn’t involve some butt kicking. In leather, naturally.
10. Take yo kids (or yo self) and go see it. You won’t regret it, promise.